No-Contact Orders and Social Media in Connecticut: Can You Like, Tag, or Watch Their Stories?

Why “Just Looking” at Their Social Media Can Still Be a Violation

If you’ve been arrested in Connecticut and the judge issued a no-contact order, your whole life changes overnight—especially online.

I hear the same question in my office over and over:

“I know I can’t call or text. But can I still look at their Instagram? Can I like a post? Can I watch their stories? What about Snapchat or TikTok?”

The short answer: social media can absolutely get you violated on a no-contact order if you’re not careful.

This article breaks it down in plain English so you don’t accidentally turn one bad night into a new criminal charge.

1) What exactly is a no-contact order?

When you’re arrested—especially in a domestic violence, harassment, or stalking case—the judge will usually issue some form of protective order as a condition of release.

The strictest version is a full no-contact order, which typically means:

No in-person contact
No phone calls or FaceTime
No text messages or emails
No letters, gifts, or having other people contact them “on your behalf”
No contact through any electronic or social media platform

Think of it this way: if the other person becomes aware of you because of something you did, you’re probably in the danger zone.

Violating a protective order in Connecticut is its own felony charge on top of the original case. One “innocent” DM can suddenly turn a case that might have gone away into a serious, long-term problem.

2) Is social media “contact”? (Spoiler: usually Yes)

Most people understand they can’t call or text. Where clients get in trouble is thinking social media is somehow different or “less real.”

Examples of things that can be treated as contact:

Sending a direct message on Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, TikTok, etc.
Tagging the protected person in a post, story, photo, meme, or comment
Replying to their story with an emoji, reaction, or sticker
Commenting on their posts—even something short like “nice pic” or an emoji
Using a burner account to send messages or comments
Asking a friend or family member to pass a message through social media

If it reaches them, if it’s reasonably aimed at them, or if any judge would look at it and say, “Yes, that was for this person,” it can be treated as contact.

I tell clients all the time:
If you’re wondering, “Is this technically contact?” the safest assumption is yes.

3) What about just watching their stories or checking their page?

This is where it gets tricky. There are two different questions:

Is it healthy for you and your case?
Can it be used as a violation?

Silent viewing
If you quietly type their name into Instagram and look at their public page without liking, following, or interacting, it may be hard to prove as a violation—but it’s still a bad idea:

Many platforms show who viewed a story.
They may take screenshots.
You might accidentally tap “like” or send an emoji.
Judges and prosecutors do not like defendants who “hover” around the victim online.

“Passive” actions that can still look like contact
Even if you don’t send a message, certain actions can easily be spun as contact in court:

Repeatedly viewing every story the moment it posts
Liking multiple photos in a short time
Following and unfollowing repeatedly
Looking at their LinkedIn profile (which can send a “viewed your profile” notice)

If the protected person reports this to the police and says they feel harassed or monitored, you may have to defend your behavior in court.

Practical advice:
Treat their social media like a blocked phone number. Don’t go near it.

4) Common ways people accidentally violate a no-contact order online

Joint friend groups. Someone tags a group of people in a photo, and you’re both in it. You comment on the post, knowing they’ll see it.
“Indirect” messages. You post a meme or song lyrics clearly aimed at the other person—especially about the case—and think “I didn’t tag them, so it’s fine.”
Apology messages. You DM, “I just want to say I’m sorry, I’ll never bother you again.” That’s still contact.
Shared accounts. You send a message to what you claim is a “shared” or “family” account that you know they control.
Using friends as messengers. You ask a mutual friend to show them a message, text, or post. Courts view this as contact “through a third party.”

If the conduct is serious enough, you can be arrested for Violation of a Protective Order even if the original case is still pending or you’re out on a diversionary program.

5) What if they contact you first?

This happens a lot. The protected person:

Texts you
Adds you back on Snapchat
Sends you a DM asking to talk
Says they want to “fix things” or “get the case dropped”

You might think, “If they’re the ones reaching out, then it’s okay now, right?” This is a common misunderstanding: the victim can contact you as many times as they want; they are not subject to an order of protection – YOU ARE. It is not a defense to a violation of an order of protection that the victim contacted you first

Unless and until the court changes or terminates the order, you are still the one on the hook. The judge’s order controls, not the other person’s feelings that day.

If they reach out:

Do not respond.
Save the messages or take screenshots.
Call your lawyer immediately so we can address it the right way—possibly by asking the court to modify the order, if appropriate.

6) Practical survival rules for social media while you’re under a no-contact order

Block them everywhere. Phone, text, email, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, TikTok, WhatsApp—everything. This isn’t about being rude; it’s about staying out of jail.
Don’t look them up. No searching, no story-watching, no profile-checking “just to see how they’re doing.”
Clean up your own posts.
- No venting about the case.
- No angry rants about “false accusations.”
- No posting song lyrics, memes, or stories clearly aimed at them.
Tell your friends to leave it alone. Ask them not to send messages, comments, or “defend you” on the other person’s page. That can still create problems for you.
Assume the judge will see anything you post. If you’d be embarrassed to see your post on a big screen in the courtroom, don’t post it.

7) What happens if you’re accused of violating a no-contact order online?

If the protected person complains to the police and shows them screenshots or messages, a few things can happen:

The officer may submit a violation warrant and seek a new arrest for violation of a protective order.
Your bond can be increased or revoked.
Conditions of release can get even stricter (full no-contact, GPS, alcohol conditions, etc.).
It can make it much harder to negotiate a favorable outcome in the original case.

Sometimes there are defenses—misidentification of accounts, fake profiles, context, or messages taken out of order. But it’s always better not to be in that position at all.

8) How an experienced Connecticut criminal lawyer can help

If you’re under a no-contact order and you’re worried you may have already slipped up online, or you’re confused about what you can and can’t do, do not guess.

A good defense lawyer can:

Review your exact order with you line by line
Explain how it applies to your real life—social media, living situation, kids, work, school
Help you fix problems before they turn into new charges
Ask the court to modify the order when appropriate (for example, to allow limited contact about children or property)

FAQ: No-Contact Orders and Social Media in Connecticut

Can I really be arrested just for liking a post or sending an emoji?
Yes. If there is a no-contact order and you “like” a post, react to a story, or send even a simple emoji that reaches the protected person, police and prosecutors can treat that as contact. I have seen this dozens of times over the years; no contact means no contact of any kind.

What if I were tagged in a post by someone else?
If a friend tags both you and the protected person in the same post, that’s usually not your fault. The problem starts when you respond in a way that you know will get their attention—commenting, tagging them back, or using the post to send a message. Safest play: don’t engage, and ask your friend privately not to tag you together.

Can I check their social media to see how the kids are doing?
Judges are not sympathetic to “I was only looking for the kids.” If there are children and you need information, it should go through lawyers, the court, or another approved method. Quietly stalking their profile is risky.

What if they contact me first on social media?
Even if they send the first DM or friend request, the no-contact order still applies to you. Until the court changes the order, you cannot respond. Save the messages, don’t engage, and call your lawyer.

Will the judge or prosecutor actually look at my social media?
More often than you think. Screenshots are easy to share and are often included in police reports and violation files. Assume anything you post, like, or message can end up on a big screen in court.

Take Action Now: Get Clear Rules Before You Make a Costly Mistake

If you’re under a no-contact order and you’re worried about what you can and can’t do online, this is not the time for guesswork. One quick click on your phone can turn a manageable case into a new felony charge and a much tougher fight.

You don’t have to figure this out alone. I sit across the table from people every week who are scared, confused, and staring at court papers full of conditions they don’t fully understand. My job is to slow things down, explain the rules in plain English, and build a strategy that protects both your freedom and your future.

Take action now. Call me, Attorney Allan F. Friedman Criminal Lawyer, at 203-357-5555 for a confidential consultation, or reach out through my contact page. We’ll review your no-contact order, go over your social media habits step by step, and put together a plan to keep you out of trouble while we work on getting you the best possible outcome in your case.